> > I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ
> > so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
> > I have never figured out why men think with their heads and women
> > with their hearts.
> >
> > FOR EXAMPLE:
> >
> > One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well, the
> > passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel
> > like it, I just want you to hold me."
> >
> > I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every
> > man on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in touch with my
> > emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical
> > needs as a man."
> >
> > She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me
> > for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing
> > that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
> >
> > The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time
> > with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a
> > big, big unnamed department store.
> >
> > I walked around with her while she tried on several different very
> > expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take so I told
> > her we'd just get them all.
> >
> > She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said let's
> > get a pair for each outfit.
> >
> > We went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
> > diamond earrings.
> >
> > Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was one
> > wave short of a shipwreck.
> >
> > I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis
> > bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I
> > threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."
> >
> > Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is
> > all dear, let's go to the cashier."
> >
> > I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't
> > feel like it."
> >
> > Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled
> > "WHAT???!!!"
> >
> > I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a
> > while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man
> > enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
> >
> > And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
> > added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the
> > things I buy you?"
> >
> > Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.