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 Me vs. Millen Fantasy Preview 
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Post Me vs. Millen Fantasy Preview
Hey, there hasn't been too much to write about (although I guess that will pick up now that camp has started), so I have been doing these fantasy preview posts if anyone is interested:

Me vs. Millen Fantasy Preview: Quarterbacks

This is the second in a series of analyses that examine the fantasy football prospects of the Detroit Lions position by position.

Although the Detroit Lions enter the 2008 season with some degree of certainty at the quarterback position (Jon Kitna is a lock to start opening day), fantasy owners find themselves with more questions and answers. The most important being: how will the Detroit Lions replace the 26 pass attempts, 13 completions, and one interception that J.T. O'Sullivan produced in clutch situations in 2007? Will either Drew Stanton or Dan Orlovsky finally be able to unseat Nick Harris from his perennial role as Jason Hanson's holder? Will Jon Kitna finally join the hair club for men?

Strangely enough, most fantasy web sites seem to obsess on much more trivial matters such as whether Tom Brady or Peyton Manning should be the first player off the board when you and your buddies gather in your mother's basement to eat Cheetos and drink Pabst Blue Ribbon on draft day. These fantasy web sites, however, will not help you out when you're on the clock in the 42nd round and you're looking to draft your fourth string quarterback. Luckily, Me vs. Millen is here to fill that void in fantasy coverage. And speaking of voids, here's a fantasy analysis of the quarterbacks on your Detroit Lions!

Jon Kitna
Most Useful in Leagues that Award Points for Donning Halloween Costumes that Satirize a Member of their Own Coaching Staff, Especially if that Satire Involves Trivializing a Serious Problem that Afflicts Millions of Americans and also Alludes to a Restaurant Chain Whose Founder has Just Recently Passed Away.
Least Useful in Leagues that Awards Points for Hair

Jon Kitna says the darndest things. Ever since his arrival to the Detroit Lions before the 2006 seasons, the antics of one Jonathan Jehosophat Kitna have delighted Lions fans and NFC North defensive backs alike. Fantastical claims that the Lions will win more games than they lose? Check. Fantastical claims that he can defeat debilitating concussion with divine power? Crazy enough to drop back to pass 561 individual times beind the Detroit Lions offensive line without having a gun held to his head? Check.

Seriously though (and it's difficult to use a form of the word "serious" and "Jon Kitna" in the same sentence without also using the words "head truama") Jon Kitna has put up some seriously mediocre to above average fantasy numbers the past two seasons. Specifically, Kitna has been good for over 4,000 yards two years running with solid completion percentages to boot, but his low touchdown passes and his high number of interceptions limit his upside.

This year, most fantasy guru's have downgraded Kitna because Mike Martz has left and has taken his fantasy football-friendly offensive schemes with him and glorified offensive line coach/Jim Coletto has vowed to install a new run-oriented scheme. Do not lose heart, however, Kitna fantasy owners. The Detroit Lions defense is still so horrible that the Detroit Lions will continue to be down by 21 points midway through the fourth quarter, therefore necessitating lots and lots of passes.

Projection: 3,831 Yards, 15 Touchdowns, 17 Interceptions, 3 Personal Visits from Our Lord and Saviour

Dan Orlovsky
Most Valuable in Leagues that Award Points for O's and Sometimes Y's
Least Valuable in Leagues that Deduct Points for Getting Horny for a Touchdown

One of the less focused on storylines of this offseason is whether in the 2008 season Dan Orlovsky will be able to top his career single-season high of 17 pass attempts. Dan Orlovsky saw the most playing time in mop up duty in a blow outloss to Atlanta, where he marched the Lions down the field on the strength of 43 passing yards before promptly fumbling in the end zone. Which, of course, suffices to eclipse the level of play that Jeff Garcia brought to the Detroit Lions' quarterback position.

Dan Orlovsky seems to have the early edge in the battle for the back-up quarterback position. If he wins the position, expect him to sneak a few pass attempts from time to time when Jesus is too busy to heal Jon Kitna's concussions right away.

Projection: 131 Yards, 0 Touchdowns, 1 Interception, 3 Broken Clipboards

Drew Stanton
Most Useful in Leagues that Awards Points for Wearing Official Team Licensed Caps on the Sidelines of Ford Field
Least Useful in Leagues that Awards Points for Appearing Even Mildly Photogenic On His Official Web Site

Did you click that above link to Drew Stanton's official web site? That has to be the least confidence inspiring finger point that I have ever seen, and it just begs for a caption:

"Uh, so that picture with the guy in a wheelchair means that is a handicapped space?"
"I think Al Harris went that way with the pass that I just threw. Is he allowed to do that?"
"Roy... um... did YOU tip the pizza guy?"

In any event, I actually kind of like Drew Stanton, but he is quickly becoming the most mismanaged quarterback since Chuck Long. For those of you unfamiliar with the young but storied Drew Stanton era, Drew Stanton suffered an injury early in training camp that, although serious, was not so severe that Stanton would not be able to come back to the team and practice at some point in the middle of the regular season. The Lions could have, you know, kept a roster spot open for Stanton so he could practice with the team and maybe get some work during some junk time in one of the half dozen blow outs the Lions suffered last season. Instead, the Lions thought "oh great, now we don't need to cut either J.T. O'Sullivan or Dan Orlovsky and we can have an open space for Eric Frampton," and they placed Stanton on injured reserve which basically meant that Stanton was foreclosed from playing and practicing football for the Detroit Lions in 2008. Not exactly a great investment in your quarterback of the future, if you ask me.

In any event, Stanton's fantasy outlook for 2008 looks dim, and it looks even dimmer if Orlovsky wins the back-up quarterback position. Given the Detroit Lions' stubborn insistence on competing hard (and failing to) win games that would make the difference between a 4-12 and 5-11 season, it is unlikey that Stanton will get much of a chance to show his stuff.

Projection: 3 Yards, 0 Touchdowns, 1 Fumble, 2 Late Night Commiserating Calls with Andre Ware

Alphonso Smith for Dan Gronkowski? Epic fail, McDaniels.

July 26th, 2008, 1:19 am
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